My breastfeeding experience the first time was quite a failure - I wouldn't say that it was because the baby was uncooperative, but I think it mainly boiled down to my inexperience and lack of knowledge. Indeed it was not successful the first time around; Hannah would scream and scream when she was put near the breast, so after some time I just gave up and pumped out the milk for her to drink from the bottle. She also drank more formula than breastmilk. It did not help that I have somewhat flat and inverted nipples which is probably why she could not latch on properly and refused to suck. Obviously with no stimulation from the baby's sucking, I did not manage to pump for long and after about 2 and a half months, when I returned to work, I stopped pumping completely. We always joke that since Hannah was born in the year of the ox, she is a cow so she likes to drink cow's milk.
This time around, I was more prepared and determined that I would breastfeed. Heidi did not have much problem latching on from Day One and she could really suck very hard! We call her our little survivor, seeing how she survived in the womb since pregnancy, what with the threatened miscarriage, risk of Down's syndrome, third trimester bleeding etc. Unfortunately with her intense sucking, very soon my nipples were sore and bleeding and hurt terribly. However, I was determined not to give up, although that first week was very stressful indeed, especially as Heidi had to be admitted to hospital for high jaundice.
Speaking of jaundice, Heidi had jaundice until she was about one month old, which is beyond that of normal babies. At about two weeks, her paed asked me to stop breastfeeding completely and feed her formula milk, to see if her jaundice was caused by breastmilk. It turned out not to be, so I could continue breastfeeding. However, since we had already given her formula milk, we supplemented on and off with formula, as naturally I don't really have that much breastmilk supply and also so I could also get some sleep at night.
I am glad to say that it got easier and easier and now I have no trouble with baby latching on, engorgement or soreness. I am back to work now but Heidi is still exclusively breastfeeding at night and early in the morning when I am with her. I pump at work and I give my pumped milk to my mother-in-law to feed Heidi during the day. However, since I am not able to pump that much, she is supplemented with formula milk as well during the day. I was very stressed initially that I wanted to breastfeed exclusively, but with the jaundice and all, it was inevitable that Heidi would be drinking formula too. So I told myself that I will do the best I can, and it's a definite improvement from the previous time. If I am too hung up on it, I will not be able to enjoy breastfeeding and now I do enjoy it as it is a precious time for me to bond with Heidi.
Another first time experience I had this time around was having "urut" (massage) sessions post-delivery which I did not have when I delivered Hannah. I asked around for some contacts and decided to go with the one recommended by Julia. I was quite apprehensive at first because I am not the type who is comfortable with letting just anybody poke and prod me all over. Also I heard that it could be really painful at times.
However, the lady who came to urut me was very nice. She was friendly and gentle and could even speak English. Her massage didn't hurt at all, except the hot stone she used ("tukul") was pretty hot at times! She even didn't mind Hannah watching whilst she did the massage - understandably Hannah was curious. At first, she was rather shy, but towards the end of the sessions, she would ask "Aunty, are you coming again tomorrow?" It cost me RM50 per session (I did the recommended 10 sessions) and I felt it was well worth the money spent.
I don't know whether it was a result of the breastfeeding or the urut, but I have definitely lost weight faster this time than the last time. I could wear my pre-pregnancy clothes to work, for which I am thankful for. I still have some way to go, but hopefully with the continued breastfeeding and minor dieting, I will be back to my usual size (or less) very soon.
So much for my long-winded post, here are some recent photos of Heidi, and some with Hannah. Heidi is a very smiley baby when she wakes up early in the morning, so we usually take the opportunity to get some nice shots of her.